Four older women are sitting

Four older women are sitting around playing Bridge.

The first lady says, “You know girls, I have known you all a long time 

and there is something I must get off my chest. I am a kleptomaniac. 

But, don’t worry, I have never stolen from you and I never will; we have

 been friends for too long.”

The second Lady says, “Well, since we are having true confessions

 here, I must get something off my chest too. I am a nymphomaniac. 

But don’t worry, I have never made a play for your husbands. They 

don’t interest me and never will; we have been friends for too long.”

“Well,” says the third lady, “I, too, must confess something. I am a 

queer. But do not worry, I will not bother you. You are not my type. 

We have been friends too long for me to ruin our friendship.”

The fourth lady stands up, says, “I have a confession to make also.

 I am an uncontrollable gossip, and I have some phone calls to make!